I'll See You in Hell . . .

Okay, not YOU directly, but these are the sentiments I hold for the "university" I attend. Many of you know the trials I've been through and the complete disdain I have for the establishment. I guess some things die hard. Because as of yet have I had an experience that makes it all worthwhile. Sure, you may say graduation and the Spartan seal on my diploma will open certain doors for me in the future . . . ha! This seal will definitely mean more to on-lookers than it ever will to me. This school has tried everything it's capable of to show me that I'm not wanted here. Either my grades haven't been high enough, my money hasn't been high enough, or on days where the office is bored they just choose to make things increasingly uncomfortable for me. I know the game, learned it pretty well, but can't do anything to adjust to it. I've paid them thousands of dollars that I don't even have, and they will probably have me in a pinch for the rest of my life. Forget that! My main goal is to pay back what I owe so I can never have any ties to this school ever again. The only reason I buy pop from the vending machine is because I'm too lazy to walk off-campus at 2am. I mean, honestly, there has been no great improvement for me from high school to college. I even got picked on in elementary and middle school and enjoyed my times more. These have to be some of the most incompetent people to ever run anything (well, in light of the recent economic crisis, I can't say that whole-heartedly). I've honestly had conversations with people who blatantly forgot what they had told me moments ago. I had to prove to a lady today that SHE told me my room assignments and such were all set. I just forwarded her the e-mail she sent me back to her. I would have paid to see the stupid look on her stupid face. My fight with administration at this school has been nothing but miraculous that it hasn't gotten violent. Either they were going to do something to me, or I was going to do something to them. They don't like me, and I don't like them. I hope they know that, because it is well known on my end. People have the nerve to criticize me for not having school spirit . . . ha(again)! This school doens't have school spirit, at least not in the sense I'm referring to. Why should I support any organization that has put me through this much turmoil? This is the precise reason I wouldn't join a fraternity. I feel like I've gotten "jumped-in" to be a part of this school and now I want nothing more than to be apart from this school. I used to be conflicted on how I should look at the "school spirit" question; if I should be proud for being a part of the institution, or if I should feel proud of being a part of the citizenship which makes up this school. I've come to the conclusion that neither is great, nor has either been great to me. These people aren't anything special. The fake individuals from high school became the fake individuals of college. The same parties I didn't want to go to because of the people in high school are the same parties I don't want to go to because of the people in college. The gangfights back then are fraternity beefs now. The girls who didn't notice me then, only notice me now if I want them too. Sure, I've met a handful of good people here that I can call a friend, but a handful out of 44,000 people is nothing to feel good about. The professors aren't here for me, the students aren't willing to help me, my neighbors annoy me, the food sickens me, the administration is obviously against me, and the money I pay to go here is not worth the services I'm receiving here. If for any reason I don't make it into Heaven, it will be because of what has gone in my years at this school. I said the other day when our football team beat the University of Michigan that I was attempted to buy a MSU hoodie . . . I may still buy it, but if you see me with it on then you'll see me in hell on the coldest of days.